


Never Alone

by ProPinkist



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst, Canon Rewrite, Family, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, and I wanted to fix it, as is my usual lol, because I didn't like that so-called "reunion" scene between them, sappiness and angst galore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-17
Updated: 2016-07-17
Packaged: 2018-07-24 12:04:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7507573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ProPinkist/pseuds/ProPinkist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After recovering from the worst night of his life, Gon goes to meet Kite again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Alone

**Author's Note:**

> Okay soooo this is a rewrite of the reunion between Gon and Kite in episodes 146/147. I've been meaning to do this for a long time, and I've finally gotten around to it. It really bothered me that they would act so formal and, dare I say it, /cold/ with each other after everything they both had been through, after everything Gon did for him and how Kite grew to care about him (don't say he didn't; I will fite u). It just doesn't make sense; they needed to hug it out, have a good cry, talk, everything. The junior hunters needed more spotlight too; there's absolutely no way they would just be cool with what happened. So this is my ideal rewrite since father/son Kite and Gon destroy me and always will. In this, Gon doesn't know the specific details of Kite now being in a different body; he just hears it mentioned that he is supposedly alive.

“Oh my god, _Gon!”_

No sooner had the door been opened before Gon was enveloped in a tight hug, and he let out an “oomph” at the unexpected embrace. After the initial surprise, however, he slowly returned the hug, soaking in the familiar scents of bubblegum and earth. It was comforting, and he squeezed tighter, his eyes misting slightly.

“Spin… I’m so happy to see you again.”

Eventually, she pulled back, wiping her own eyes. “Thank goodness… We were all so worried about you,” she said, sniffling. She looked tired, Gon noted, her eyes red and bloodshot, and bags underneath them. It hurt to see, the confident way she usually held herself completely gone now.

“So… you knew about me, Spin…” he said, looking down guiltily. Gon wondered how much else she knew. Of course she had to know about… the most important thing _._

Spinner Clow nodded sadly, turning for a moment to beckon at who he assumed were the other junior hunters inside the manor before facing him again. “Yes, we heard all about that mission you and Killua were… assigned… and what you did, Gon… w-what happened…”

She put a hand over her mouth to keep herself from crying, and by this point five other heads had poked into view, Monta Yura’s enormous one nearly taking up the entire space in the doorframe. Gon momentarily forgot about his crushing guilt upon seeing them, despite how equally out-of-sorts they looked, and he smiled up (or down, in Pondungo and Lin’s case) at them. He knew he would have to apologize profusely soon, but for now he simply basked in his happiness at seeing them.

“…What am I doing; please, come in,” Spin finally managed, and everyone made way for Gon to step inside. It was a nice house indeed, and he wondered how exactly they all had gotten here in the first place. All he knew was that Morel had provided it, but he wasn’t sure on any of the details past that.

They made their way into what looked like the living room, but the floor was covered in, strangely, toys. Stuffed animals, dolls, a dollhouse, and even what looked like pretend swords… He stopped walking upon hearing a squeak under his foot, and when he looked down, he saw it was a stuffed clown toy. He picked it up, staring at it intently, and a strange feeling that he couldn’t quite understand welled up inside him.

Then he noticed something else on the floor.

Gon leaned down and picked up one other object in particular. It was a wooden spoon, and taped to the non-bowl end haphazardly was a curved piece of plastic in a sickle shape. It was made amateurly, but he could still tell exactly what it was supposed to be. He turned it around in his hands over and over again, and the strange feeling turned into a chill that went down his spine.

Feeling a gaze on him, he turned his head slowly to see Spin watching what he was doing. She had a haunted look in her eyes that he didn’t like in the slightest, didn’t fit her at all.

Unnerved, Gon set down the pretend weapon, not wanting to look at it anymore. He fidgeted, knowing he needed to break the tense atmosphere, and say what he needed to say. What he owed to them, if the really did know everything…

Taking a shaky breath, he turned to face them all and forced himself to bow.

“I… I’m so sorry, everyone!” Gon cried, trying not to get too emotional yet. “I was careless, I let my emotions get the best of me, and it almost killed me, and Killua. …A-And… I’m sorry… so _so_ s-sorry for-!“

He couldn’t even get out the words he dreaded saying most of all before he was in a bone-crushing hug yet again, with all six of them this time (and so the “bone-crushing” part wasn’t completely an exaggeration, with Monta there). He kept quiet, sniffling slightly and waiting for one of them to say something.

“W-We understand, Gon,” Spin said, her voice trying to break. “We _all_ understand how you felt… and we only have a _description_ to go by; you were _there_!” Gon’s heart sank, and he bit his lip. _Who told them; why tell them everything; why tell them THAT?!_

“You’re very brave, and very kind, Gon,” Pondungo said quietly, who was small enough to fit into one of the crevices in the hug pile. “You may have been reckless, but… you did what we couldn’t. My only regret is that we couldn’t be there to help you.”

“Yeah,” Stick Dinner murmured in agreement. It was strange to hear him being serious instead of making a joke. “If… If we had even half the strength you did, we would have been there with ya.”

“No… No, I wouldn’t have allowed it,” Gon whispered, stifling a sob. “Least of everyone, _you_ all shouldn’t have had to see…!”

Spin shushed him, rubbing his head slowly as a big sister would. “It’s over now, though… all that matters is that you and Killua are safe. That’s what matters… we couldn’t bear to lose someone else again!”

Gon pushed aside her use of the word “again”, and he smiled to himself, her words making him happy. “I didn’t know… you cared about us that much, Spin.”

Spin laughed weakly, telling everyone to let Gon breathe, and they all let go, to his relief. She smiled back, and it was genuine. “Of course we do. Your love for and the lengths you went to for Kite… I can’t even put into words how much it means to us.”

“Yep,” Monta added, patting Gon’s head with his giant paw-like hand. “Any friend of his is a friend of ours.” Everyone nodded their heads in agreement.

It was the first time Kite’s name had been spoken, but none of them had seemed to be affected by it. Gon looked down, blinking rapidly.

“…Thanks, everyone.”

After a moment of silence, Spin put her hands on her hips, letting out a sigh. “But! You didn’t come here to see us, I know.”

Gon slowly raised his head, his eyes widening. Of course, she was right… but even after what Morel and Ging had told him, he was still afraid, deep down, afraid to hope… especially after how they had been talking here. But…

She held out her hand, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears.

“…I’ll take you to him.”

It was all he could do not to burst into tears himself at that very moment, but Gon somehow managed to keep himself together. It wouldn’t do for his face to be a wet mess when he met Kite. He wouldn’t approve of that.

Turning for a brief second to nod his thanks to the others, Gon bounded after Spin, his heart the most light and free it had been for a long time now.

As they walked down a hallway to the opposite end of the manor, they passed by someone along the way who caught his interest… or rather, something. It could only be described as a small, pink koala bear in a tight-fitting tuxedo, almost as tall as Gon. As it noticed him, its’ steely and unamused expression did not change, and after they had passed each other, it did not look back.

The scene would have seemed ludicrous to a lot of people, but it wasn’t to Gon. He stared, his jaw agape and just managing to sputter out the words.

“S-Spin, that’s a chimera ant, isn’t it?!” _What is one doing here; how DARE._

“Most likely it is,” Spin sighed, not even blinking. “Kite has had a couple visitors up till now. None of us know what they discuss with him, but he insists we let them in, no matter who, so we comply with his wishes, as much as it makes us nervous to… it’s the least we can do now.”

Gon wanted to protest about how dangerous that was; not all chimera ants were bad, he knew, like Meleoron, Ikalgo, and Palm, for example. …But he didn’t want any near Kite anymore, no matter how little of a threat they may pose. Just the thought of it made him angry.

Something in her tone kept him from saying anything, however.

They soon reached a room at the end of the hallway, and Spin stopped in front of it. She turned toward Gon, looking like she wasn’t sure how to voice her next thoughts.

“…Kite’s in here. Please talk to him, Gon… I know that seeing you will lift his spirits more than even we have been able to.”

Something in his stomach churned, and he wasn’t sure what to think. There was something off here, he thought, with the way they had all been acting, and the things he had found in the living room… he was scared. He didn’t want to think anything was wrong… If Kite had visitors, he was definitely alive, right? So what was…

“…Why is he in this room, locked up all by himself, Spin?” Just saying the words out loud chilled him to the core.

_Not again. Not alone in a room again. I don’t want that for him, not ever again!_

Spin didn’t reply, but simply gave him a sad smile. Turning towards the door, she knocked on it firmly a couple times, calling to the person inside.

“Kite, you have another visitor.”

She patted Gon’s back reassuringly, and opened the door for him. Once he was inside, she closed it behind him without a word, and he was alone.

The room was rather dim, and appeared to be some sort of parlor. There was a sitting area in the middle, some potted plants off to the side, and a piano in the back corner. Gon scanned the place, his heart beating wildly in his chest, searching for the familiar tall figure with the long, flowing hair, to no avail. There didn’t seem to be _anyone_ in here, let alone who he was looking for.

Wait, there was someone.

Standing next to the window, half in the square of light on the floor and half in the darkness, was a person. Gon hadn’t thought it was anything more than a statue at first because of how still they were, but if he looked closely, he could detect the faint movements of breathing. From the back, they looked to be female, and about his height. She had all black on, and had burgundy colored hair that reached just past her waist.

All of the color drained out of his face as Gon came to the only logical conclusion there was to come to, and he forced himself to keep his mind from racing. So many questions, so many worries, so much confusion… but he couldn’t show that for now.

Taking a shaky breath and squeezing his fists at his sides, he finally spoke up.

“…Kite…? I-It’s me, Gon.”

 

* * *

 

Upon hearing the small voice of his newest visitor, Kite closed his eyes, and it was all he could do to keep his legs from giving out underneath him.

It was him, he was here, he was real, he was _alive, oh my god he’s alive he’s real he’s here it’s him-_

But.

He was _here._

Kite tried desperately not to let his emotions show, breathing slowly and clearing his eyes of any possible liquid. He turned around slowly, hesitantly, uncertainly, and when he saw Gon’s face, it was nearly enough to make him falter.

He put on a small smile, trying to look at least somewhat confident and inviting.

“…Hello, Gon. …Long time no see, huh?”

Kite cringed at the sound of his own voice; no longer was it the strong, deep tone he had had before. Now it was a thin, wispy voice of a young girl, and hoarse from disuse as he had gotten… older. He didn’t even recognize it anymore, or any other part of himself anymore… he would doubt he was even the _him_ he had known if it weren’t for his memories.

Gon let out a small squeak upon hearing him, and he approached him slowly. He looked so small, so scared, so worried, and it made Kite want to cry. This was what he dreaded the most, Gon having to see what had become of him. The person he had looked up to no longer existed, both in body and in spirit. He was pathetic, and every time Gon saw him, it would only be a reminder of what had happened, things that he wasn’t quite sure on the details of yet, but could just _imagine_ –

His breath was suddenly knocked out of him, and he realized belatedly that he was on the floor in a heap. Kite raised his head dumbly, looking to see what had happened… _Oh._

Gon was hugging him in a vise grip, sobbing and wailing like a child. Which was exactly what he was, Kite knew. As a hunter, Gon was forced to mature beyond his years, when he absolutely was not ready to, he now knew too late… no one his age should have to. He didn’t know much of what had transpired while he was… out, but Kite could sense that Gon was finally releasing everything he had held inside for two months now; a wave of grief, terror, heartache, and finally, unconditional love that was so very _Gon._

All for him. …All _because of_ him.

 _“KITE!!!_ It’s Kite, Kite’s here, he’s here he’s not dead he’s alive, Kite’s talking and breathing and knows who I am, it’s _you!!!_ Kite it’s you I’m so sorry, I!!! –“

Gon’s rambling eventually became unintelligible, except for the repeated utterances of his name over and over and over again. It broke Kite’s heart, and yet at the same time, it touched him beyond belief. To think that he had ever been worried that Gon wouldn’t want to see him like this, or wouldn’t recognize him… it seemed so silly now. He felt a little better already.

There was one thing he knew for sure, however.

After Gon’s sobs had quieted down and his hold on him had loosened, Kite gently scooted backwards, pulling Gon up by the hands. When they were both in a standing position again, Gon looked at him curiously, his face still soaked.

“Gon… Are you completely healed now from before?”

He looked confused for a moment, before his eyes widened in surprise and also a bit of a sadness.

“Y-Yes…? But oh, K-Kite, you know ab – “

Gon was interrupted when Kite punched him, sending him to the floor yet again. It wasn’t a very strong punch, but it was strong enough to knock him off his feet again, and Gon sat there in shock, rubbing his cheek. Kite stared down at him, little tears finally streaming down his face.

_“That’s for almost killing yourself for me, you fool!”_

Gon’s reaction was instantaneous. His expression changed from pain, to surprise, to sadness… and then finally, to Kite’s confusion, the biggest smile slowly spread across his face. He was crying, and yet also smiling brighter than he had ever seen him smile before.

“Oh, _Kite_ …” Gon whispered, wiping his eyes and sniffling. “…It really is you. There’s no doubt about it.”

He closed his eyes, rubbing his hand over the red mark on his face as if it was the most precious thing in the world to him.

“That wasn’t as strong as back then… but it wasn’t the same as last month, either.” He looked at Kite again, his eyes still shimmering with tears and his voice cracking. “It… I-It’s definitely you, Kite!”

Kite stared, dumbfounded, processing Gon’s response that was so different from what one would expect. After a few moments of silence, however, a small smile slowly crept onto his face, and to his surprise, he found himself _laughing._ It was an alien sound, and yet he couldn’t even think about how uncomfortable it made him. This was the first time he had laughed since regaining his sense of self… it felt good. Even if what he was laughing at was nothing more than sad irony.

“Oh, Gon…” he chuckled, wiping his eyes with his fingers. “You never cease to amaze me.”

He inhaled deeply, and held out his hand to Gon, who was looking happy but also a bit confused.

“Come here; let’s talk.”

Gon nodded slowly, clearly trying to compose himself as well, and picked himself off the floor. After he had approached Kite again, Kite examined his cheek.

“I’m sorry about that. Does it hurt; do you need something on it?”

Gon shook his head, trying to reassure him.

“No, it’s fine, Kite. …It helped.”

Kite sighed, ruffling Gon’s hair. “Right, if you say so.”

He led Gon over to one of the sofas in the room, sitting them both down. Once they did so, Gon curled up against his side, obviously still wanting to not let him go. Feeling his eyes mist up a little again, Kite brought his arm (now much shorter, to his frustration) around the small boy, holding him close. They remained like that for a few minutes, neither speaking. Kite knew that he should say something to Gon, but for the life of him he couldn’t figure out how he should start. No words seemed good enough to express all of the guilt, sorrow, frustration, and yet also utter gratefulness and appreciation he felt. So much Gon needed to hear, and he was at a complete loss for words.

While he was waffling, Gon beat him to the punch.

“Kite, about what you said earlier… I-I… I’m _sorry_. Everything that happened to you… a-all of it… _it was all my fau-!”_

Kite put his finger on Gon’s lips, silencing him and shaking his head.

“It was not, neither you nor Killua’s. Neither of you were at fault; do you understand?”

Gon shook his head frantically, tears flying from his eyes, as he grabbed Kite’s hand and pulled it down away from his mouth.

“It _was,_ Kite!! You told us it would be dangerous, over and over and over again! You told us to run away if we were in danger and leave you behind… if we hadn’t hesitated, it wouldn’t have gotten the j-jump on you, but cause we did, the least we could have done was come back to help you f-fight! …If we hadn’t come with you at all, you wouldn’t have been burdened by us… and probably wouldn’t have run into that t-thing at _all!!!”_

_“Gon.”_

He pulled out of Gon’s tight grasp, putting his hands on his tiny shoulders instead.

“Please listen to me, Gon. You trust me, don’t you?”

“O-Of course I do, Kite, more than anyone in the world!” Gon whimpered, still crying.

His heart melted yet a little more, but Kite kept his serious expression, staring into Gon’s eyes. He knew that he didn’t look like who Gon remembered anymore, which he cursed, but he hoped that at least a shadow of the old him, the one Gon looked up to, was still there.

“Gon, we could think about it for days, but it is _impossible_ to know whether or not that would have happened if I had been alone. Even if I hadn’t encountered… it, right then, I probably would have been overpowered once I reached the nest. …I was wrong; I underestimated that mission. It was too much for three people, let alone one, to handle. …I’ve never regretted being wrong about something so much.”

Kite breathed shakily, rubbing one of his hands up and down Gon’s upper arm in a soothing motion. The latter watched him do so, still looking upset.

“What matters the most to me, more than _anything_ else… is that both of you are safe. When… When _it_ happened, I… I was afraid. Afraid of what I knew… would happen to me.” It felt strange, to talk about his vulnerabilities like this. In the past, he had insisted that Gon and Killua not see him as a role model or a mentor… but even then, he knew, he had unconsciously wanted to be the person that Gon saw in him.

Now, however, things were different. They had both changed over the course of two months, as sad as it was. Gon was hardened, upset, and no longer the cheerful and optimistic child he had once been. Meanwhile, in a strange twist, Kite felt like the childhood self he had long since cast aside had surfaced again; all of his confidence and passion was gone, replaced by worry, depression, bitterness, and apprehension, like that which had ruled the first fifteen or so years of his life.

He didn’t want for Gon to have to see this side of him, let alone in this different body. But it was reality now.

Gon’s distraught reply proved his point. “I-I didn’t ever think you could be afraid of anything back then, Kite… but now I believe you! I’m sure you were, and I… I-I’m _so-!”_

“But even during my initial fear, fear of something else made me forget about that,” Kite interrupted quietly, trying to downplay what he had said before. “I wanted to make sure you got away safely. That’s all I could think in that moment. I knew how critical the situation was, I _knew_ it was bad… I had tried to plan for a situation like that ahead of time, which is why I told you what I did… but it all happened so fast, when things had been perfectly calm just a few minutes before… I don’t blame you for freezing in the shock of it all, but all I could see was that thing getting on the two of you, and then that would be the end of it, a-and I just-“

Kite leaned his forehead against Gon’s, hating how his voice was cracking in the midst of his tears. He had been scared for his life back then, but now, he felt even more helpless than he had then. So small, so frail, so weak, so very unlike the Kite he had tried to be for Gon and Killua all that time.

“…Please understand, Gon,” he whispered. “I didn’t want to die, I never have… but if I had had to watch you and Killua die beforehand, I… I never would have been able to live with myself.” _Not like I would have had to for long… until this happened,_ were the unspoken words, but of course he didn’t say them. “So many would miss you both if you were gone… and I would have failed them all, including you. I regretted taking you with me, but not because I blame you, _never_ … but because of what could have happened to you, if Killua hadn’t acted as he did.”

Gon, who was still leaning against his head, wrapped his arms around Kite’s neck tightly, his sobs getting louder once again.

“Kite, n-no… I didn’t _care_ if I got hurt! I just… _I just wanted to save you!!_ W-When we got out… we got roped into that mission to take out the King and his guards… and I was so certain you were alive, I was _so_ sure… but then they found you in the nest… I-I can’t even begin to describe it, Kite, what that _monster_ had done to you!!! And Killua and I were assigned to defeat Pitou, and all I could think about was saving you, I was just thinking about how much pain you must be in, how lonely and cold and hurting you were in that room for so long, a-and I tried, I tried _so hard_ , but then I had to _WAIT_ for Pitou to do something… I-I wanted to kill it so badly right then and there, but I couldn’t… I knew I couldn’t, deep down, because I needed it alive to save you… and then… a-and then… we _finally_ got back to you and and a-and Pitou said… s-said… _said that-!”_

Kite pulled Gon into his arms, pressing him to his chest and effectively cutting him off. He only had half the story from this emotional ramble of Gon’s, but he could surmise a lot from it even still, and he prayed that he wouldn’t throw up right then and there.

“…I’m sorry,” he finally managed. “I had no idea how much my death would affect you… how cruel me telling you to leave me behind would feel to you.”

“K-Kite, p-please… d-don’t say it like t-that,” Gon sobbed brokenly, his voice muffled in Kite’s chest. “You didn’t do anything w-wrong… It’s my fault, all my fault, I wanted you back so badly… I missed you _so_ much… I tried, I tried so hard, so _hard_ , Kite, to save you… please believe me…!”

“I believe you, Gon; I believe you with every fiber of my being. …And I can’t even put into words how it makes me feel.”

“E-Even when there was nothing else I could do to save you, K-Kite… I-I tried to a-avenge you. I killed Pitou with my own hands. I made it suffer… l-like you did… that was all I managed to do.”

Kite pushed Gon back out of his embrace so that he could look at him again, even as he was still crying himself.

“Gon, you did plenty, you did enough, you did _everything_ for me and I… I am so moved, more than I have ever been to _anyone,_ I _promise!_ ” He held Gon’s gaze yet again, his eyes pleading. “…But _please_ , don’t ever do anything like that again for anyone… p-please… have I made it clear yet that you are as important to me as I am to you?”

Gon’s face crinkled up with guilt and despair for the hundredth time, and he looked down.

“…K-Kite…”

Kite hugged him for the hundredth time, trying to convey all of his love and worry to the one in his arms. He had never been so emotional, so open with his caring, before. But this whole nightmare had made him realize how attached he really was, and he wanted Gon to hear everything he needed to hear.

“I’m sorry you had to go through all that. I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you… that you felt like you had to carry that burden alone… I’m _so_ sorry for everything… if you didn’t survive that, Gon, I-I… as I said, I couldn’t have lived with myself… ever.”

He frowned, his voice shaking.

“…Just like it hurt you to see me… that way you said… I, too, could not bear to see what had happened to you.”

Kite heard Gon inhale sharply, and the grip around his neck tightened.

“Y-You saw me… K-Kite?”

“I did,” he replied solemnly. “As soon as I was… fully aware of myself, and was told what had happened, I immediately went to see you. …It was the only time I’ve left the mansion so far.”

Gon let go of him, settling next to him on the sofa once again. He seemed to have calmed down by now, tired from all the crying, and he leaned against Kite’s shoulder as the latter rubbed his arm comfortingly.

“It was horrible… what had become of you… I’ve never prayed or wished so hard in all my life, Gon… praying that you would pull through by some miracle.” He trailed off, looking up at the ceiling and trying to force the terrible image from his mind.

“I-I see… I’m sorry, Kite,” Gon mumbled, his voice thin and strained. “I just… lost it… and used so much power, more than I ever though I had… because I wanted that thing to suffer for everything… that was all I could think.”

He wiped a few stray tears, sniffling, and Kite squeezed his shoulder.

“I know, I know. …You idiot; I wanted you to get stronger, but not to go crazy like that,” Kite chuckled weakly.

Gon managed a small smile.

“I’ll be better from now on, Kite.”

Kite squeezed him, nodding with satisfaction. “It’s over now. …That’s all that matters.”

At his words, Gon’s brow furrowed, and he looked hesitant. Kite waited, knowing he would say what he wanted when he was ready. Eventually, he did so.

“…So, um, Kite… What _happened_ to you?”

Kite let out a heavy sigh, looking at his lap. He had known this would come up eventually, but he wasn’t sure at all how to explain it… except as some divine miracle or twist of fate.

“…I’m not really sure, to be honest,” Kite began, putting his fingers together as Gon listened attentively. “The last thing I remember from… _before,_ was that fight… And then eventually I became aware of being in existence again. At first, all I knew was my name. It felt… right, somehow. …Then, as I… grew up, I remembered more and more… until I was this age, and I had regained all of my memories.”

Gon stared, dumbfounded and obviously still confused.

“Wait, Kite… are you saying you… were _reborn_ … like this?” He gestured to him awkwardly, and Kite nodded, frowning.

“Yes. I was born as a… little girl.” He cringed at the words. “And I’ve lived here, in this mansion, all this time. I don’t know how my consciousness got into this body, or why… The person who, er, raised me, so to speak, seemed to assume that I was someone else when I was first born. …It was back when my consciousness had just barely begun to form again, so it’s fuzzy… but I vaguely remember being called by another name… and then once I became aware enough, I had to clarify that I wasn’t who they thought I was. …So that’s the story.”

He wisely decided not to mention what exactly his caretaker had been, or the matter of the tail. That implied only one thing, something he didn’t want to think about, and that he knew Gon wouldn’t take well. Kite thought that he probably already suspected; after all, normal humans didn’t grow this fast. But perhaps he wasn’t mentioning it for his sake. It was a twisted irony, after all, that he would become exactly one of the ones that did him in.

Gon looked down, his eyes squinted in confusion, and Kite imagined steam coming out of his ears. The mental image amused him, despite himself.

“I don’t get it… but Ging told me your Hatsu had a special, secret ability… he said it only activated when you were determined not to die. …I guess that caused it?”

Kite looked shocked for a moment, but then he rolled his eyes, sighing as he let his head collapse back onto the sofa. “Is that so… He never told me anything of the sort. Leave it to him to tamper with my weapon without telling me. Such an insane magic trick… sounds like something he’d do.”

“Heh, yeah… But it saved you, so it’s not necessarily a bad thing, right Kite?”

Gon smiled at him, and it was a sincere one.

“And, I don’t know… He may have known about it, but I have a feeling it wasn’t his doing, Kite. …I wouldn’t be surprised if you made it happen all on your own. I wouldn’t put a miracle like that past you.”

Kite sighed again, hugging Gon close and trying not to cry again. “Well, heaven knows I wished hard enough to be able to stay alive and with all of you.”

“Mmhmm.” Gon looked down, obviously trying to hide his tears again. “I…I’m sorry you’re like this now, Kite… I know it must be hard for you, not looking like you used to… I’m so sorry.”

Kite flicked his forehead, sighing, and Gon looked up, his eyes teary.

“No more apologies. It will be hard, yes. My entire lifestyle, the way I interact with people and the way they interact with me, will change. …But I think I will manage, with all of you here with me,” he said, his voice soft but determined. “After all… I was given a second chance at life. That doesn’t happen to just anyone. …That’s something to cherish.”

Gon braved a small smile, wiping his eyes with his fingers as Kite rubbed his head.

“…You may look different now, Kite… but I still get a sense of you. That strength and fire in your eyes; it’s just like what you’ve always had. …I recognize it.

“I… I’m glad you’re back.”

“…I am glad to be back, too, Gon,” Kite said, closing his eyes. “A new body seems like a small price to pay for living as myself again. I get to be with all of you again, today and tomorrow and the next day and the day after that… I get to live again. That’s all I could ever ask for.”

He took Gon’s hand in his own, squeezing it tightly. Before, his long fingers had swallowed Gon’s little hand, but now they were the same size. It saddened him, without a doubt, but it would getter better with time. Everything would.

“I won’t ever leave you again… I promise.”

“Neither will I, Kite,” Gon whispered, his voice small as he snuggled up beside him again. “I’ll protect you… won’t fail again… always.”

They talked more as the day wore on, taking comfort in each other’s presence. Gon talked about everything that had happened during the last couple months, explaining it all to him. He knew talking about it must have been hard for him, but he also suspected it helped Gon, in a way. The story was both horrible and mind-blowing at the same time, and Kite was once again confronted with conflicting feelings of being heartbroken for Gon, but also in awe of everything he had done. Not that he would ever wish such a burden like that on anyone, still.

Gon told him about the other hunters he had met, and the test to get back into NGL, which he and Killua had both failed. He told him about the chimera ant friends they had made, which amazed him. The thought of humane ants had entered his mind back then, but he hadn’t thought about it again for obvious reasons until what Gon told him. Kite decided he wanted to meet them at some point.

After that, the story led to the infiltration of the King’s palace, the longest night of Gon’s life. Gon didn’t have much more to say about this after what he had said before, but that was perfectly fine. There was no need to speak of that horror anymore.

As Gon talked, Kite wondered about Killua worriedly. Gon didn’t say much about him, except that they had gotten separated during the mission after he had found the cat, and that Killua was probably the one who helped save his life after he had lost control. Gon seemed averse to talking about him, and it concerned Kite. He had expected that Killua would be right alongside Gon, trying to help him get his revenge… He was the smarter and more logical of the two, it was true, but he was still vulnerable when it came to certain things, Gon especially. Even in that split second, Kite had known that it was hard for Killua to abandon him with Gon for their own safety, no matter how wise it was, and he thought that he’d want to go after that monster just as much as Gon did. Even if not for Kite himself, for Gon, most definitely. They were very close, and helped each other always.

Kite didn’t know what had happened between them, but he knew Killua must be harboring an immense amount of guilt. He knew he had to see him as soon as possible. While he had known Gon longer, that didn’t mean he hadn’t grown to care about the other boy just during those few weeks. He was worried about him.

After the story had finished, Kite brought up the other subject he had wanted to for a while now.

“So… you met Ging,” he said. Gon had mentioned it in the earlier conversation, but he had chosen not to press it then. It hadn’t come as a surprise, because he had heard about Ging’s involvement in the election for the new Hunter Association chairman, and knew the two would inevitably meet again when (never if) Gon had recovered.

“Yeah I did, Kite,” Gon replied quietly, smiling a little. “I got really upset… to him about you… but he told me you would never die for anyone, that you weren’t that weak. He was right… I never should have lost hope.”

Kite wanted to feel happy about Gon’s faith in him and happy that Gon finally achieved his goal, but instead he just felt angry. “…What else did he say?” he asked, trying to keep his voice even.

“He knew you were alive because of that, and also because of your secret Hatsu ability I mentioned earlier. He told me to come here to apologize for not being strong enough, and promise that it would never happen again,” Gon said, closing his eyes. “And it won’t. I swear it won’t, Kite. I’m sorry; I’ll protect you from no-“

“You don’t need to apologize for anything except for scaring me so badly, Gon,” Kite said curtly, trying to hide the fact that he was reeling inside. He had wanted Gon to reunite with his father, that was what they had both wanted, but he had never dreamed that it would be after these horrible circumstances. No longer did he feel like meeting his old master, not like this… except to maybe question what exactly he thought he was doing telling Gon those things upon their reunion. Kite knew he owed everything to Ging: his life past the age of fifteen or sixteen, his proteges that were practically family to him, his job, his place in society, and his happiness… but he also owed him for Gon. He had known Ging had abandoned his son when he was a baby, but the implications of that hadn’t truly begun to hit him until now. Gon’s journey, his training, his suffering and near-death, all of it was because he had left in search of his father.

But Ging was also the reason he had met Killua and all his other friends, all those people he had seen near Gon’s hospital room back then fretting over him.

The reason _he_ had met him.

_You gave everything I have to me. It was all worth it, even if it ended up like this. …But even still, I won’t ignore it if you hurt him._

Kite had heard that one of Gon’s friends who shared his sentiment had somehow gotten wrapped up in the election and had sucker punched Ging, at least. The thought made him smirk to himself with satisfaction.

Gon was crying again, tears staining his face over the stains that were already there from before, and Kite squeezed him tightly, rocking him back and forth. He couldn’t stay angry at a sight like that.

“No more apologies, please Gon. It wasn’t your fault, and you don’t need to make up for anything.” He rubbed his head soothingly, hoping his words made an impact. “There will never be a next time that you need to protect me; I’ll make sure of that. …And even if there was, I’ll always be the one to protect _you._ Every time.”

“K-Kite…”

“…Do you want to go back to Ging?” He didn’t want to say it, but Kite knew he needed to. They needed to talk, because despite his complete lack of tact, Ging had things to say Gon would want to hear, Kite knew. He was an eccentric and an idiot about some things, but he was still wise to some degree after all the traveling he had done. He was still his father.

“…N-Not right now,” Gon finally whispered, curling into Kite’s side even more than he already was somehow. The smallness of his voice only contributed to the vulnerable way he looked. “I want to stay with you, Kite…”

Kite swallowed down what the proper response should be, and smiled, blinking back tears.

“…Alright.”

They sat that way for a long time, somehow never becoming bored, but simply taking solace in the fact that the other was there. After enough time had passed, Gon allowed him to leave to bring him something little to eat from the kitchen, but the rest of the time he clung to Kite, not wanting to let him go. At some point, Gon moved his head onto his chest, and Kite knew what he wanted. _“Don’t worry, I’m alright, it’s beating,”_ he murmured to him as his rubbed his head rhythmically, and it seemed to soothe him. If he was being honest, Kite wanted to feel the same thing Gon did, have that same reassurance, like a child would. But he didn’t; he already had proof enough that Gon was fine.

Eventually, the sunlight coming through the window turned to moonlight, and the parlor was almost completely pitch black. Gon had long since fallen asleep, and when Kite finally decided it was too dark in the room for him to be comfortable, he made to put him to bed. It was harder to carry Gon than it would have been before, but he could still do it, thankfully. It was only right.

Passing by the living room on the way to his bedroom, he felt some stares on him, and he turned to see Spinner Clow, Pondungo, Monta, and Stick Dinner watching him. They all looked surprised.

“…I’m putting him to bed. Once I do, I’ll come eat with you all… i-if you haven’t already. …I know it’s late.”

Spin’s eyes widened even further, but after a few moments, her lips curled into a smile, her eyes shining.

“I’ll make something right away, Kite.”

“Anything is fine,” he said quietly as she walked past him, not wanting to wake Gon. “…Thank you, Spin.”

_Thank you all for being the best family one could ask for._

He brought Gon into the room he was staying in, where there were two beds. Once he had laid Gon down in one of them, Kite took off his boots and made sure he looked comfortable. Gon smiled in his sleep as he pulled the covers over him, content.

After watching him for a few moments, Kite leaned down, kissing him on the head.

“…I love you. I’m here now for you, always. And I’m never leaving again.”

Kite smiled softly, and then proceeded to leave the room, closing the door quietly behind him before he could hear Gon’s mumbled response.


End file.
